


Gilmore's Glorious Gym

by shaypotter



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Percy/Vex - Freeform, the gym!au no one asked for
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-18
Updated: 2018-01-18
Packaged: 2019-03-06 13:51:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,097
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13412637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shaypotter/pseuds/shaypotter
Summary: “Sir? Are you okay? You’re looking a little red…” Those words coupled with a nervous laugh pull Percy’s eyes back to the blonde behind the counter and away from the beautiful woman currently smirking at his obvious stare.Percy clears his throat, fingers nervously adjusting his gold rimmed glasses. “Yes, yes. My apologies. A tour would be fine with me first, just to - ah - see the whole… Gym.” He finally stutters out. Of course he would forget how to speak the moment this - Gods save him - glorious creature steps into the room.





	Gilmore's Glorious Gym

His fingers hover over the brass door handle, sweat pooling just above his brow. It’s cold in his grasp and it settles a bit of the nerves fluttering in his stomach.

He could do this. It used to be so simple when he was younger, and surely with time it would grow to be just as easy. There was no reason to be so embarrassed. With a great sigh of someone about to do an act most unfavorable, Percy shoves the glass door open and feels rush of stale air conditioning hit his damp face. He squints against the bright fluorescent lights and inhales a strong scent of lemon from some sort of cleaning agent, he assumes.

“Hi!” a cheerful voice pipes up from behind an expansive wooden desk. The desk dominates a majority of the right side of the lobby and holds three ancient looking computer stations. Garishly colored flyers hang from the desk and promote deals for personal trainers, protein powder containers, and gym memberships. He blinks hard and shifts his eyes back to the woman speaking. “Welcome to Gilmore’s Glorious Gym! Have I seen you around here before?”

Percy gives a tight lipped smile, his head shaking with a ‘no’. She’s cute, pretty even, with a sweet smile and a halo of blonde hair falling over her shoulders. Tiny, too, he thinks as he peers down over the ancient looking computer monitors to meet her gaze. Her shirt, a soft looking thing in dark purple with a sparkling unicorn adorning the front, was one he recognizes as the gym’s rather curious logo. “Well, no, this would be my first visit here.” He explains, eyes traveling from the cluttered front desk on the furthest side of the room, to the dark wooden stairs in the middle he assumed led to the actual gym. Off to the left was what looked like a closed smoothie and coffee bar with several chairs stacked on tables surrounding it. “I saw an ad in the paper and just wanted to check it out and see if it’s something I'd like.”

The woman behind the counter gives him another of those sweet smiles, putting him at ease, her hand outstretching and waving him closer to the desk. “Great! So happy that ad brought you in today. Are you interested in a tour of the gym? Or are you just gung-ho ready to sign up?” Percy’s eyes narrow as he considers his options but the creaking of a large metal door behind the desk steals his attention. Percy flicks his gaze away from the employee to investigate the sound and instinctively does a double take as a woman enters from what he assumes to be an employee lounge or back room.

His eyes take in the loose fitting, hunter green t-shirt with a neon pink unicorn emblazoned across the front of it, sporting block letters reading “GILMORE’S GLORIOUS GYM” in sparkling print. But the ridiculous shirt isn’t what holds his attention. No, even with the loose fitting shirt his eyes can see toned arms and a lean frame leading to a thin, pale neck and a similarly pale face. But her face, oh -

“Sir? Are you okay? You’re looking a little red…” Those words coupled with a nervous laugh pull Percy’s eyes back to the blonde behind the counter and away from the beautiful woman currently smirking at his obvious stare.

Percy clears his throat, fingers nervously adjusting his gold rimmed glasses. “Yes, yes. My apologies. A tour would be fine with me first, just to - ah - see the whole… Gym.” He finally stutters out. Of course he would forget how to speak the moment this - Gods save him -  _ glorious _ creature steps into the room.

The blonde gives him a bright smile, ignoring his strange broken speech, and turns to the beautiful woman now tapping away at one of the computers on the front desk. Percy immediately feels dread pool in his stomach and wonders if it’s too late to just pay the fees and run upstairs. “Would you mind giving Mr - erm,” she hesitates and shoots Percy a curious look. “What’s your name?”

“ Percival Fredrickstein Von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the third,” he blurts out on instinct before realizing they hadn’t needed to know his full name. There’s a beat of awkward silence before he continues, “But please, call me Percy.” Up until this point, he had been purposefully keeping his gaze away from the woman who had stolen the words right out of his mouth, but at the introduction he couldn’t help but allow his eyes to travel to the lovely face once more.

“Pleasure to meet you, Percy,” she smoothly replies, walking around the counter and approaching Percy’s frozen form. Internally, he can hear alarm bells sounding in his mind and red lights flashing in warning.  _ SHE IS BEAUTIFUL AND WE ARE NOT EQUIPPED TO FUNCTION WITH THIS _ , his mind shouts but Percy ignores the panic churning in his stomach and finally outstretches a hand to meet her awaiting one.

Her hands are slightly chilled, probably from being inside the air conditioned building but, he notes with some surprise, not nearly as soft as he would expect. They were instead calloused - like his own - and her grip sure and firm, as is the smile she sends him.

“Let me give you a tour, darling. I’m sure you’re going to like what you see,” she offers with a wink. Percy’s alarms redouble the effort inside his head, this time growing louder.  _ WE ARE NOT EQUIPPED. _

The tour is short and sweet as she shows him the equipment options, the seperate rooms for classes and weight training. She tells him that they also offer personal trainers if that would ever be something he wants to try and Percy just nods mutely through most of it while listening to her pitch.

She’s very good, he has to admit with a bit of respect. She smoothes over his awkward silences without fail, confidently presenting each aspect of the gym without hesitation. At the end, he agrees to sign up for a six month trial that she swears is the better deal than a strictly month-to-month plan.

“I’m saving you a pretty penny, darling,” she whispers conspiratorially to him as her fingers fly over the keyboard, committing him to his fate. He just smiles at her and thanks her quietly for her help before leaving the gym feeling dazed, red-faced, and stupid.

And that night if he dreams of dark eyes and a clever mouth…

Well. No one has to know about that.

**Author's Note:**

> Just an idea that's been cooking up in my head. Haven't posted fic for this fandom ever but this idea has been sitting in my computer since July so I figure it high time I added a gym!au to the mix.


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